DEAR WORKING ON IT: Your son has told you it’s all right to call him, so you should. Because of the blessing of modern technology, there are other options as well — texting, video chat, etc. If you are unfamiliar with them, make it a point to learn. Be grateful your son and his family are independent, and try harder to fill more of your time with hobbies and interests of your own. If you do, you will be a more interesting person to be around. Your son and his wife should not be the focus of your life the way he was when he was a child and you were responsible for him. It isn’t healthy for you or your relationship with them.
DEAR ABBY: My fiance and I are in our late 20s and get into arguments about what time to leave a party. I usually need to leave around 11:00 p.m. or midnight, and I think he should leave when I do. I’m a full-time student with a full-time job, so I don’t go out often. Between school and work, I don’t have weekends off like he does. He accuses me of being selfish for wanting him to leave. He says he doesn’t want to be “lame.” I don’t think it’s appropriate for a woman to leave a party on her own. Am I selfish? Should I try to stay up later so he can have a good time? — PARTY ETIQUETTE
DEAR PARTY ETIQUETTE: No, your job and your studies have to be your top priority. Years ago, I would have agreed that your fiance should leave with you. However, these days, women are more independent. Cellphones and ride-sharing have given us other options. Unless you are concerned that leaving alone would be dangerous, don’t turn it into an argument if he wants to stay.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.